Editor’s Note: This story is part of Onward State’s April Fool’s Day series. It is satirical, intended for entertainment and should not be taken literally. All quotes were made for the purposes of this article.
The Blue Loop: Serving campus, downtown… and the West Coast of Africa via College Avenue.
Recently, CATA announced that the beloved Blue Loop will add a few more stops to extend its route. These stops will allow the Blue Loop to cross the Atlantic Ocean to the northwest coast of Africa.
The landmark move is the result of a weird GPS error that placed the location of the blue loop halfway across the world. CATA said reports of inaccurate locations sparked the off-the-beaten-path initiative to expand east.
“When we learned that the Blue Loop was accidentally showing up in Africa, we knew we had an opportunity on our hands,” a CATA spokesperson said. “Now, Penn State is able to connect more with World Campus students, while maintaining a portion of Blue Loop services in the heart of Happy Valley.”
With much longer journeys, some community members have expressed concerns about increased wait times between stops. CATA said it would consider adding a full fleet of new buses to keep things running smoothly. To date, however, the organization has not found a way to get Blue Loop buses across the Atlantic Ocean.
Additionally, CATA said it will introduce a Blue Loop Express route that will follow the “original” route of the Loop along campus and downtown. The two new routes will launch on Monday, April 4.
The blue loop will remain free for all passengers, but those descending on another continent will need a valid passport in hand.